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“What’s the matter?” “Nothing at all.” But meanwhile, those two words radiate everything that is not good. By an angry and averted face, for example, a monotone voice. How is nothing wrong? The content of the message that one of them sends does not correspond at all to how it is said. And that creates tension.
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During our Love Learning #1, relationship therapist Joey Steur addresses this type of friction in communication within relationships. Where did they come from? And why do they arise?
Verbal and nonverbal communication both have a message in them. An example: when we laugh together we show: the two of us are having a good time. When there is tension or anger, we look away. Or we turn our face or body away, such as when we lie in bed. Those signals are as much an important message, in addition to all the words we use.
Communication within relationships: ground rules
This is one of the communication principles described by Paul Watzlawick. By looking at Watzlawick’s 5 principles, you can examine what goes wrong in communication. Ground rules often give couples a lot of insight.
How does that work out for you and at what level of Watzlawick do you sometimes fail? In our first Love Learning, Joey explains what the model entails and what you can get out of it for your own relationship. How to use the model to improve communication between the two of you.
Improve your communication
It is a proven method that we often use with couples in our practice room. Because perhaps the most common question we get is, “Help us improve communication. We keep getting stuck.”
Need tips for a lasting relationship? Listen to the Love Learnings or make an appointment with one of our therapists.
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