June 18, 2026
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Differences in sexual desire are one of the most common reasons why couples come to Praktijk de Liefde for relationship therapy. It occurs in virtually every long-term relationship: one partner wants to make love more often than the other. This doesn't have to be a problem, but when the difference creates tension, it's important to talk about it.
A difference in libido means that partners differ in how often or when they feel the need for sex. One person might feel desire daily, the other weekly or less. Neither is wrong. It only becomes a problem when it remains unspoken and leads to frustration, rejection, or distance.
Differences in libido rarely have a single cause. Often multiple factors play a role at the same time:
When differences in libido aren't discussed, a negative spiral often develops. The partner with more desire feels rejected and starts pushing. The partner with less desire feels pressure and withdraws further. Both partners feel misunderstood. We see this pattern regularly at Praktijk de Liefde, and it can definitely be broken.
At Praktijk de Liefde we treat differences in libido within the context of your relationship. We don't just look at sex itself, but at the patterns surrounding it:
By making these patterns visible and breaking through them, space is created for a sex life that fits both of you. On average, couples need 4 to 8 sessions for lasting improvement.
If differences in libido create tension that you can't resolve on your own, relationship therapy is a logical step. At Praktijk de Liefde, sex therapy is integrated into relationship therapy. There is no waiting list and you can often be seen within a week.
Do you recognise yourself in this article? Our therapists are ready to help you. Schedule a no-obligation introductory session.
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