Divorce lawyer or mediator?

When you decide to separate, you gradually choose a divorce lawyer or mediator. What is the difference between these disciplines? And what does one do and what does the other do?

Divorce lawyer

A divorce lawyer is not a mediator, but represents the interests of one of the partners during the divorce process. Communication between ex-partners is between both lawyers, partners do not see or speak to each other. This construction works well when, for example, there is a lot of resentment and anger, and communicating together really doesn’t work anymore.

A mediator represents both interests, of both parties. In short, the mediator’s work comes down to discussing everyone’s needs and putting that on paper. Think of it as a conversation to map out what each party wants. What is important to some and what to others, and how do we find a middle ground in that?

But the mediator also does this

The mediator also handles the formal side of the divorce. Such as wealth distribution based on the marriage regime, but then also pension distribution: what is the best fit? Next, the mediator makes an alimony calculation of both spousal and child support. All this will be in a covenant, after which the parenting plan will be drawn up (if there are children).

When a child is 12 years old, they can be involved. The mediator at Practice Love conducts these child conversations herself, by mutual agreement of course. For example, she asks: what do you think of the plan? Are you behind it? Sometimes parents express a desire to conduct the child talk themselves. That too is possible. And if there is a lot of anxiety beforehand about making the rules for the children, we start the formal procedure with this part.

Petition for separation

The mediators at Practice Love are lawyers or have completed training as registered mediators, but are not licensed to file petitions for divorce with the court. Our mediator works with a regular attorney who handles the final piece of the divorce and files this petition. This attorney is not responsible for the documents prepared. The mediator remains the point of contact, until registered.

Do you have questions about divorce or the role of a mediator? If so, feel free to contact us.

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