How to deal with heartbreak, heartache and pain?

Soul pain, heartache, grief for lost love, it comes along at one time or another in all human lives. How do you endure heartbreak, heartbreak and pain? Do you have experience with it? Such a nasty feeling that drags you down with you and hangs over you all day. A rotten feeling it is, true, but how do you deal with it properly so that you overcome the pain again? Is there a middle ground, that it’s there but you can also move on? Read along for our tip.

We are used to fighting grief and pain. So swallow and move on, push away or distract yourself with other things, fun things preferably. Still, it remains to be seen whether that really takes away the pain. After losing love, breaking up, you need time to recover.

Letting go of love

Even though we tend to resist pain and sorrow, what would happen if we allowed it? What happens when we truly make space for grief, heartache and mourning the loss of love? May it be there for a moment? Can you allow it as long as necessary?

‘Precisely in grief is the connection with others,’ says psychiatrist Dirk De Wachter in an interview in Vrij Nederland. He argues that grief is normal and well part of life. And that it is precisely important to let the grief be there. To share it with those around you and not put it away. Because you then also salvage the other emotions, fine feelings, for example. When you give your grief a place, allow it, you experience that the sharp feeling diminishes. For example, by sharing it with others. It often makes the pain more bearable.

Open to grief, space for love

Moreover, being open to grief – allowing emotions and processing heartache – also means being able to open back up to new connection and love. Practice with it, you will see that it comes easier to you.

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